July 1st, 1763

Today was a day full of activity. The Littledales buzzing like bees to get everything done for the wedding. The bride busy with being nervous, the groom even more of that. Harriet and I stole ourselves away into the park to talk and have a little peace. The other men went riding and some I think fishing... The bride's father priding himself to have his last daughter married so well and the groom's father wishing all the trouble to be over with.

I stayed in my room all morning, not wishing to see anyone, neither Harriet nor her Clive. I am sort of sick of all this love around me. It's not even my friend, but also Lord C's friends and the newly-weds to-be. All this happiness about the wedding. It makes me envious on one hand, because I didn't feel that way when I got married, and furious with myself on the other hand, because I am not the wife my husband deserves. I could see him eyeing his friends at last nights ball and how contented the young Littledale seemed to be.
Still the whole time he was very gracious and not a soul would think him unhappy. Nor me. As it is usually uncommon to show marital felicity, we are not supposed to radiate happiness.
For the young couple here it is a love match, their families very modern and not opposed to see them flirting and though Harriet and Clive don't show their mutual love for each other like the bride and groom do, it is plainly visible how they feel. I wonder if Lord Cs friends asked him about how he likes to be married. (Harriet told me, that one is not truly married after all, when there wasn't a wedding night... - So THIS is still to come.)

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June 30th, 1763, night part 2

@ Littledale by Emmeline Cartwright

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June 30th, 1763, night part 1

Thursday
Today we went to attend a ball at a more distant manor house. We drove 2 hours to get to Littledale, a picturesque setting right out of a book.The younger son, Lieutenant Flynn Littledale, a close friend of Lord C's, and just recently back from Quebec, marries his long-time fiancée, a Miss Brightwen. The Littledales are very wealthy people and now, that their son arrived back home (alive), they can afford to give him a generous living.
With the lucky man came also his friend Harbottle Shaughnessy; also an old friend of Lord C. I begin to wonder how many people that man knows and where from... - I very well know that he doesn't know them from Quebec, as he didn't come from the colonies after his brothers death - he was already in the country when it happened... Or he came back earlier than his friends, for the capitulation was already three years ago; only the peace treaty was signed this year in February... - I realize, I don't know the man I'm married to at all...

Well, we arrived here at Littledale and met the family and Lord C's friends. Mr O fascinated by their stories and Harriet and I were immediately shoved into the brides room... How I detest nuptials...

When the ball began, Lord C had nothing better to do, than asking for my hand in the first two dances. What else could I do than accept. Harriet danced of course with her Clive, but had filled her dancing booklet in no time and was not available for help. I also danced with Shaughnessy, who was very amiable; a distinctive trait among these friends I suppose. Mr. Littledale also asked for a dance and was very eager to have all informations about how his friend got such a wife... What!? I think I turned red as a strawberry and he just smiled, thinking me adorable and shy... Men!
The rest of the night was very pleasant, as the music was wonderful and the Littledales had hired a couple of professional dancers to entertain.

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June 4th, 1763

Tonight we went to the Humberdross's little gathering. Lady Humberdross greeted us very warmly in the hall and we saw Sir H in deep conversation with Mr. Walker.
The night started with a meal, enlivened with music. After dinner the company retired to the drawing room, we passed an hour with tea, cards and more music - which enabled me not to listen to Lady H. After the gentlemen joined us the conversation turned to politics. Tired of too much to think about Lady H urged her husband to return to the dining room, which was now empty for the dancing part of the evening. The ball was made up with seven couples dancing, including Lord C. and myself. I haven't danced with him yet and it was quite an remarkable event.

We didn't talk, we just looked at each other and danced the dance. I was so struck by his smile and his touch. I couldn't but think what a handsome husband I have and how kind he always is towards me. We danced two dances for we are married after all. But it was already slightly scandalous. But in the country it was excused. So Mr. Walker told me when we were dancing. Lord C. had the 'pleasure' in dancing one with Lady H. I pitied him for the conversation she kept boring him with... After that I danced with Sir H and his Lordship with Miss Bentham which I liked. She is a fairy tale creature and so shy that it was her first and only dance tonight.

We had refreshments later and then went home.

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